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I am about to request something selfish and pig-headed. Could y'all (yes, I said y'all) give me an update for my birthday? I've been looking for one for a while and maybe, just maybe, this will be enough incentive. My b-day is Feb. 17. I'd really appreciate it! Upon reading the update, I would chortle to myself while wearing an unbelievably large grin. I would then laugh and smile periodically throughout the day; remembering the weirdest gift I had ever received. I would continue life with the satisfaction that, once again, I have made a difference in this world. Convincing, yes? An update would be great, you have an excuse. Smile a lot (it's good for you). Don't eat too much fudge (no matter how good it looks, tastes, or smells-- limit yourselves!) A truckload of blessings upon all of you!
February 8, 2005 9:28 PM
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To date, this is possibly one of the weirdest guestbook entries we have seen. But weird is good, so here goes…
Elizabeth Brown (aka: the untamed), this is your update. This is an update wishing you a happy birthday. And lucky for you, as this is being written we have nailed down whom we are touring with this fall in support of our new, and as yet unrecorded, hit record. How do we know if it will be a hit? Because on this day, the anniversary of your birth, we know that it must be. And how do we know? Ohhhhhh, chortle chortle chortle, these are scientific issues that will be understood only in the future. Trust us. We know.
Oh, wait, whom are we touring with? You’re right, that is important information. Information so important that we cant tell you yet. HA! Didn’t see that one coming, did ya? We will say this: A possible name could be the “Texas Trifecto Tour.” Now, let your imaginations run wild.
Which reminds me, Elizabeth Brown (aka: the Untamed), we know you not. But that doesn’t mean we cant tell you to let your imagination run wild on this, the spot on the calendar that marks the day on which, some years ago (because we don’t know how old you are), you were brought into this hard, wonderful thing we call life. Let it run, run, run, like it has never run before. Let yourself grin and chortle like a fool at the strangest news article we have ever produced. Go on and eat your fudge. It’s your birthday.